A Personal Note

By John Hobday
CEO and Founder
HealthCare Interactive, Inc.
Minneapolis, Minnesota

July 22, 2004

In 1997, I founded HealthCare Interactive, Inc. (HCI), and since then, we have created an extensive collection of Alzheimer's and dementia training programs in areas as diverse as dementia basics, dementia-related behavior, and late-stage dementia care.

Everything I have learned about Alzheimer's and dementia could not have come at a more opportune time for me and my family, because in 2000, my grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. Because of the programs we had been developing, I saw it coming long before the actual diagnosis by her doctor, and I was able to help family members as the disease progressed.

My grandmother, Therese Morzinski, and me, at her 93rd birthday party in 2001

My grandmother will turn 96 in December of this year, and while she still continues to slowly decline mentally, her quality of life is really excellent at the nursing home where she lives. The staff members are excellent, and she is thriving—weighing more than when she arrived over three years ago.

As a family, we have definitely been through the wringer, though. We've experienced all of the typical challenges with this disease. We had to decide when to take away the car; how to work with her physician to make a diagnosis; how to provide for her basic needs; what to do when she wasn't eating; when to make the decision to move her to a nursing home; etc. Additionally, she took a terrible fall two years ago and, within a few months, had gone from about 110 pounds to 70. After being called to the nursing home to say our goodbyes, she made an unbelievable (albeit slow) recovery. As of her 95th birthday, she is up to nearly 130 pounds and doing quite well. At the nursing home, they call her the "Miracle Woman." My grandfather died very suddenly from a heart attack when I was young. None of us ever had a chance to say goodbye. With Gram, that is not a problem, because we've had a long time to adjust to everything. That is one positive thing you can say about this disease—you have plenty of time to say goodbye.

Much of my approach to caring for Gram came from the HCI training programs and interactions with countless professionals with whom I've been in contact. It's been a long road, but I've been extremely lucky for having learned so much about Alzheimer's and dementia during these past years. One of the statements that our national panel of experts constantly reinforces—and has made such a difference with me personally—is that with Alzheimer's or dementia, you have a lot of time to plan for changes that will occur, but you need to take advantage of that time! It's so easy to deny all of this is happening.

My heart goes out to each and every family member who is affected by Alzheimer's and dementia. It is my sincere hope that the website training programs we've developed will make a significant difference for all caregivers as they have helped my very own family and me personally.

2005 Update: In early December 2004, my grandmother fell and broke her hip. After weeks of decline and internal bleeding, she passed away just three days before her 96th birthday. We miss her tremendously, but take comfort in the fact that she had such a long life and such wonderful care during these past three-and-a-half years.

2009 Update: Last month, my grandmother would have been 100 years old. It would seem odd to even be aware of the date, but it seems like just yesterday that she passed away. My ears still ring with familiar (and funny) things she used to say: "Can I make you an egg?" "Take a can of soup from under the steps." "Oh! [drammatic hand on the heart] I'm so dry! Could you pour me half a cup of root beer?" "You'll never get a girlfriend that way!" "Ach du lieber!" As with anyone you loved deeply, there are just so many memories that seem to pop up when you least expect them. Her last years with Alzheimer's disease continue to influence my work on a daily basis. I remain committed to do whatever I can to help families and professionals who are affected. "Happy 100th Birthday, Gram."